My Mental Health Journey: Contraceptives, Social Media and Anxiety

I previously wrote a post a few months back (I believe) about contraception and the pill. I thought I would do an updated version for you all if you’re interested. I had loads of positive feedback about my last one, so I hope you all can relate to this possibly.

The last time I went in depth about the pill was I think back in November / December. I had the whole of December off any pill, I didn’t take anything. I gave myself a break as my mental health was so bad.

If you’re new to my blog then you might not have read that previous post. But as a re-cap, my mental health plummeted massively last year.

I’m still slowly improving with it, it is not perfect at all. But no ones is ‘perfect’ and I have to accept that mine won’t be. But with slow positive improvements, I will gain confidence in myself and my mental health will hopefully improve.

So, relating to the pill, I am now back on contraceptive pills. The last pill that I stopped made me not have periods. The pill which I stopped was called ‘Desogestrel’. Which I’m not gonna lie, was great. That was the ONLY POSITIVE THING about that pill for me though. Not having periods just made things a lot easier. I didn’t have to worry about when I was ‘coming on’ or whether I would be on for holidays etc. But that pill for me, made me the worst person that I have ever been. My mind, body and soul felt like another human being.

I’ve been incredibly lucky with my skin, as I’ve never struggled with it, it’s always stayed the same since I was younger and I’m thankful for that! I don’t struggle with spots or breakouts. I of course do get spots, but it’s not an aspect that I worry with. When I was on my old contraceptive pill, my skin was relatively normal as per. My skin was not affected, just purely my mental health was.

In terms of being on my new pill, I’ve noticed a mass difference in my mental health. It’s still a struggle for me, due to my car crash and other issues that have gone on in my life, but in relation to my new pill, it’s allowed me to have periods. My new pill is called ‘Microgynon’. Which I have a 7 day free week in which my lovely monthly occurs, hallelujah.

I have no clue whether this is just me or if others have felt like this, but by having my regular periods every month, my hormones and mindset has stabilised again! I think by gaining my periods back, it’s allowing my body to function how it should do, with regular periods and normal ‘up and down’ moods.

The pill that I’m on now I take every day, then I have a week break. During that break week, I have my period (yay). Before Christmas, the pill that I was on made my body not have periods, ever! I would sometimes have ‘spotting’, which is normal, but other than that I wouldn’t have my period.

By my body not having a regular period for so long on that contraceptive pill, it made my mental health plummet. At my worst state, I finally decided to go to the doctors again to talk to them about how I was feeling and how to overcome it.

This is a very personal post for me, so if I’m grammatically incorrect, then forgive me. I get emotional and on a role when writing so I apologise, ha!

I went to speak to the nurse at my doctors, she was incredible. I have always felt more comfortable talking to nurses about my thoughts, problems and feelings. Nurses just understand how I feel more, on a personal level.

I don’t remember much of last year if I’m honest. I don’t remember the beginning of last year at all. I don’t remember writing assignments, completing essays or handing in projects. I can’t remember any of that. I have never spoke to anyone about this really, so I decided to talk to the nurse. I broke into tears and couldn’t speak, so the nurse actually had to get me to see someone else because I needed ‘referral’ and other chats.

Long story short, we decided that I should come off that particular pill and that I should have a break for a month, to see if it would improve and just trial it. Personally, I didn’t want to go on anti-depressants or any pills like that. Just for me, I didn’t want anything else in my body as that contraceptive pill really made me nervous to put something else in my body at the time.

So fast forward to now, I am on a new contraceptive pill, which allows me to have regular monthly periods. My skin has stayed the same. I still get very bad days and I can be very overwhelmed with anxiety in certain situations. I still hate driving and hate when other people drive me, that won’t go away much I don’t think. But in terms of my contraceptive choice, I’m very glad to be on my new one.

I’ve been on this one since January and I’ve noticed a large difference in my daily feelings, how I interact with people and my confidence has gotten better. It’s not fabulous lemme tell ya haha, but that’s a personality trait that will hopefully improve with time and patience.

I’ve achieved so much this year already and I’m very proud that I managed to stabilise my negative thoughts by just simply changing my contraceptive choice. There are SOOO many different types of contraception. Pills might work for you and not someone else. The implant might work for someone else and not work for you. This is OK!! It’s a trial and error scenario if I’m honest. You do not need to go on the pill, if you feel comfortable not being on one then live your life happily and wonderfully. But if you are deciding to try one out, then trial and error them.

You won’t get all of the symptoms that the packaging says. I did get symptoms for my old pill, hence why I changed. But it’s different for everyone.

I’d just like to say that the only symptoms I have had on this new pill have been a few headaches. They’re localised and can hurt a lot (ie ache). I am planning on visiting the doctors or a nurse soon to speak about this issue. I’ve been on the Microgynon pill before a few years ago now and I stopped it because of my headaches. But recently I haven’t had them, so it’s a hit and miss. But make sure to note down if you get symptoms, because they could indicate a problem.

I’m proud that I’ve managed to change my pill. I’ve spoken to people about how I feel and even though I still get bad thoughts every now and again, it is no way near like how it was back on the original contraceptive pill.

We all go through so much, some people speak out, some are quiet about it. I don’t tend to tell anyone about my problems, so I’m a quiet one. But for the purpose of my blog and how I want to create a positive and safe space for my readers, I write these posts to show you that even the happiest of people on social media and Instagram can have pretty crap mental health days, weeks and months.

Instagram & social media hide emotions. I love social media and Instagram as I can show you all my posts and my outfit ideas, but as whole, social media hides feelings and thoughts. Take it from me.

Love, Sophie Eleanor x

2 thoughts on “My Mental Health Journey: Contraceptives, Social Media and Anxiety

  1. Thank you for sharing this – I don’t think a lot of people consider how the birth control ‘pill’ – whichever one you may be on – can affect your mental health. I’m on cilest and I don’t think I’ve seen any difference, but I do believe that it’s the only reason I still get periods (due to anorexia, I think without it my periods would’ve stopped), so I think it has helped keep my body functioning, as it were

    Liked by 1 person

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