Why not now?

Everyone has their up’s and downs, I haven’t been in a good mindset lately, probably because there hasn’t been much sun, and i’m feeling a bit unmotivated. I love to write as it gets all my feelings out of my system and I can start a fresh. What I’ve learnt is that you can’t carry all this negative energy around with yourselves all day and night. I’ve been trying to let out my grudges and struggles these few months without having too many mini blow-ups here and there.

This post is really all about why I began to blog. I’ve had some lovely people message me on Instagram and speak to me in person telling me that they love that I blog and write about mainly fashion and other subjects too. People have mentioned to me that they would love to do it but don’t have enough confidence to actually pursue blogging. I’ve loved all of you coming up to me and messaging me because it’s really kind of you all and it does make me feel tonnes more confident about writing freely what i’m thinking from day to day or about my fashion styles. However, just because I do blog doesn’t mean i’m confident, in a previous post I’ve wrote all about confidence which is all true and from the heart. I feel like I am getting more confident because people say to me that they enjoy reading my posts, which I’m super thankful for!

The reason I began to blog about fashion and other subjects wasn’t because I has some sort of epiphany that I wanted to start blogging, but it was because I felt it was the right time for me to. I’ve always loved watching vlogs and reading blogs that either relate to me or that I enjoy, such as adventure vlogs or food blogs. But it was the right time for me when I had an experience that wasn’t pleasant and did give me a fright.

I was on a roundabout in January this year and a large lorry hit the side of my car and I ended up spinning off the roundabout at a speed. My car is now written off (her name was kiwi and she was literally the love of my life), and it made me so nervous and shaken up that I didn’t want to get back into a car. Many of you reading could possibly know someone who has been involved in an accident or know of someone who knows someone who has (etc). But it was honestly so shocking and awful. Even though it wasn’t my fault in the slightest I still have a feeling that ‘well if I wasn’t there at that moment then it wouldn’t have happened’. But at the end of the day it did happen, and unfortunately it happens every day around the world. The lorry crossed over two lanes to eventually hit the side of me and basically hit me off the roundabout. I could’ve hit so many passing cars but thankfully I didn’t.

In addition to being shaken up due to the crash, the driver of the lorry didn’t even get out of his lorry to see if I was OK, which I think annoyed me even more than the whole situation. I had around three cars stop for me which was incredibly kind of them and I’ve thanked them since. I’ve realised that not everyone can be liked by everyone and I’ve learnt that now, I’ve learnt that people will dislike you for whatever reasons but you shouldn’t let them have the upper hand. You should just let them have their opinion’s and not let it affect you, because at the end of the day I’ve realised that even strangers can be so kind to you and help you in a time of need.

This post isn’t meant to be a ‘poor sophie’ post, because it sadly happens everyday and luckily I was OK. Trying to have control of an uncontrollable car is incredibly tough. It happened so fast that when my vehicle ended up in the verge I was very confused and didn’t understand what happened fully. In addition, the thoughts I’ve had since crashing haven’t been nice. At the beginning I blamed myself for being there at that moment in time, but I couldn’t have known it was ever going to happen.

I couldn’t sleep for the first like two weeks, I kept waking up hearing a loud *BANG* in my ears, even though there wasn’t actually a noise. I had an awful headache the day after and that lasted a while, I’ve also had an x-ray of my spine but I am fine though so that was good. I now go to a physiotherapist every week and I have acupuncture, because I have muscular whiplash due to tensing up as I tried to steer my car.

So you’re probably wondering ‘well what does this have to do with blogging?’ Well the crash made me realise that the situation could’ve been so much worse, just like every situation or accident or any problem, it can be much worse. But mine wasn’t and i’m so glad that I got the chance to start blogging, because in all honesty I don’t care about what others might think negatively about my posts or whether people think it’s a strange thing to do in my spare time. I always wanted to begin to blog and write about fashion and other issues or subjects and the crash made me realise that why not now? Why not start now? Why wait?

Blogging and soon to be vlogging about my passions and thoughts makes me feel so much better, it allows me to let go of negative energy I have instead of keeping it all in. I love to talk about fashion and share my thoughts on styling and garments, but not every post I write has to be about it, i’m going to start exploring other subjects too, i’ll mainly talk about fashion but the odd post here and there about life would appeal to more people and allow me to release my thoughts through writing.

This past month I’ve also realised that my group of friends are honestly the best and I wouldn’t change them for the world. We have each others backs and I would do anything for any one of them. You know if someone is a good friend to you and each and every one of my little weird group are honestly life long friends of mine. We can all annoy each other but you wouldn’t be friends if you didn’t. I’ve learnt that you don’t need to be liked by everyone, having a group of friends that would be there for you in a flash is all you need. I love them all.

Learn to love and be loved.
Don’t wait for the right moment to do something.
Love life and love yourselves.
Speak next Friday.

Love,

Sophie Eleanor xxx

 

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